Heroes Die

I want to be just as Thee, storming with power in a raging sea.
Taking on hell and Hades with the roaring fire I´ve seen You making.
Let them tremble at our feet just as they tremble when You speak.
They must learn to fear the weak for we were transformed in lightening streaks.

Yet Hades is fought down in hell – a match with death you´d never live to tell.
Clean each other´s trembling feet and listen to Me as I speak.
Bravery is on the coward´s lips and he dies because of it. Try not to speak so much, but just try to live as such.

Bravery is more than the craze of power, but is knowing to accept your own humbling hour.

If you want to be just as Me you must try on My death in order to have authority.

Anthem of the Preacher´s Son

              “Vanity of vanities,” says the son of the preacher man; he said “yes” to everything and not once took a stand.

              

               Never again was such haste taken in simply just wasting away – life as loved under sun scorched haze. A life of searching for one´s own way.
                Searching for the beat of one´s own drum – the beat of the heart that beat his mind numb. Adding up everything to find a poorly given sum.

              

                 Everything and nothing all at one time; everything he looked for with nothing to find. The very feeling of being alive strangely enough killed his mind, the very guarantee of death over time. Slowly but surely being eaten by lies.

                
                   Now all is said and finally done and we come to find that the preacher has won, for it may be that all is vanity, but that which we need can only be found beyond the sun.

King´s Kids

                Sometimes I feel like this is the best way that I could spend my days if only it could last for always. I´m willing to pay to do this forever.
                I see the children of the King as if they were mine to up bring and I would die happy doing that one very thing.
              Spending everything to give them my best even if it takes away a few years rest – I know that doing this I´ll have no regrets.

                

                 You see, all my dreams can be summed into one – that they can walk farther than I could ever run. I feel like they´re the reason I am what I´ve become. 

Bucket Wish

I never thought I´d write like this.
I never thought I´d fight like this.
I never thought I´d actually want to open up my eyes like this.

Have you ever had a dying wish?
What is at the end of your list?
What do you lie in bed regretting that you never did?

I don´t want to be that scared little kid, nor be an elder well hid.
I want to be someone who´s free
and soars through the air like the great kiskadee.
I want to be the person that hides away in my dreams.

Have you ever closed your eyes and been challenged by what you see?

A Mile in My Own Shoes

I want to be the me I needed –
The person for whom my younger self begged and pleaded.
Someone who was willing to see that my soul had a dying need even though I´d never dare speak  it.

When I was young I wanted to be seen, I wanted to be heard, and I wanted to bleed.
I didn´t want to hide my pain but every day I felt slain by the fear that kept me back.
No one ever seemed to be aware of how easily I fell off track or how my insides screamed for just a little bit of slack.

Now I´m on the other side, and I don´t want to be the one who fails to see when someone is about to derail in the same way that I once did.
Many times I can see what many think they´ve hid.
Someone has to tell them that it doesn´t matter what they did.
I so desperately want them to know that God´s love is not some trick.

Maybe it´s time to show the things that I for so long hid – maybe it´s time that I myself do what I wish someone else did.

Misfit Equality

                Has anyone ever tried to tell you who you are? Tell you what to believe and what to see in the stars? Everyone knows what I once was, but that doesn´t mean what they think it does.
                Looking into my past will never show you my present even though it may explain some things that my words haven´t.
                I never wanted to be “out and proud;” I never could fit in with that crowd. Now I´m not saying that we all should hide, but the thought doesn´t sit well with me to be proud of pride.

                For the longest time I hid who I was inside fearing that if I didn´t I would take a side that´s unappealing to you. Yet I´ve found myself in an intriguing position – a position that appeals to neither of the battling groups. I´m a person that understands what it´s like in both sets of shoes.
                I side with a nearly nonexistent group, and because of that I think that you can learn from me too because even though we don´t agree I still respect and love you.

My Vows in Retrospect

             I had always wanted to write my vows, but I had no idea what to say and little idea how; and when the time came to finally think and I finally thought that I was ready tragedy struck and one of those that inspired my life expired and breathed her last on this earth and with her death waned any chance that inspiring words could in my mind be arranged and I said the traditional “I do´s.”

               
               So, without further a due, this is what I would have liked to have said to you the day we said “I do.” On that day we promised to never leave no matter what we go through. On the day that God trusted me to be your ideal help. This is what I would have liked to have said:
                I am not perfect. Yet, even so, there are no words to describe  just how hard I will try to be everything that God has asked of me – please be patient because Proverbs 31 is not easy.
                I´m honestly scared out of my mind of failing and at the same time driving you crazy – my violence is an outburst of my perceived insufficiency. And I really wish you knew that it´s not you who did this but it´s something so well hidden that I myself don´t even get it.
                I would have liked to have warned you that my love is different – no matter how hard I try I´m just not much of a princess. But instead of staring at all that my love isn´t you´ve helped me to learn what it is. If nothing else, it´s definitely genuine. It´s not based in things that change or conditioned to things staying the same but committed to the promise I made.
                And try as I might I´m just not romantic and I never really understand your antics, but I absolutely love that that´s who you are.